Dick in the Dirt

It is complete!

2010-09-05T15:57:00.000-07:00

Production on Dick in the Dirt has officially wrapped, and post-production is completed.

Total movie running time: 1 Hour, 41 Minutes, 2 Seconds

Don't forget, the premier is at noon on Saturday Sept. 11, and please bring as many people as you can!

UPDATES

2010-09-02T14:33:00.000-07:00

1) The audio portion of Dick in the Dirt is completely done.
2) The entire movie should be completed by Monday, September 6th.
3) There WILL be a trailer for Dick in the Dirt, but it'll be after the 6th.

The Official Movie Poster!

2010-07-29T17:52:00.000-07:00

Official Movie Premiere News

2010-07-26T10:23:00.000-07:00

Okay, it's official - The movie premiere for "Dick in the Dirt" (written and directed by Ryan) will be at 12:00pm (noon) on Saturday, September 11, 2010.

The premiere will be held at the Garland Theater, at the corner of Garland and Monroe in Spokane , WA. Cast members get in free, otherwise tickets will be $5 per person. There will be a fully staffed concession stand. The theater can hold around 600 people, so please pass the word, and let’s get some bodies in there!

Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it), this movie is not kid-friendly... but if you are reading this message, you probably already know that.

OH, and Ryan is putting the end credits together right now, and he have lots of space in the 'Special Thanks to' section, so if anyone has a pet cause, project, business, etc and they want a mention, let him know.... and anyone who specifically DOESN'T want a mention, hey, he totally understand :)

Saturday, September 11 - Remember, if you're not there, the terrorists win!

The Director's Favorite Still From Saturday's Shoot

2010-07-19T23:32:00.000-07:00

Back To Work!

2010-07-09T14:16:00.000-07:00

After a few months of hiatus, the Dick in the Dirt wagon is back up and running! We just finished up a small shoot for Weasel's character, and this Sunday we're going to be filming yet again. I'll be sure to take some photos of the props that were used, as one's going to be pretty gross, and the other one's just funny.

In the mean time, here's two more sneak peeks at bits of the movie:

Canine's dramatic jail yard entrance.

Weasel's flashback scene:

Props For Movie Magic!

2010-05-13T20:45:00.000-07:00

Ryan needed a fake penis for one of the scenes in the movie, so naturally he decided to use a specially made bologna from our local meat market to do the job. He had the guys make it in a summer sausage casing instead of the usual, and then cut to size.

Because of the nature of the scene, we also needed to make some fake blood and also hollow out the fake penis. Here's a few pictures of what Ryan had to do to make it work:

Here Ryan is using a very long bit to drill out the bologna.

He went with a kitchen knife to make the hole bigger.

Here he is posing with the bologna.

Here's a close up of the finished product. Notice that Ryan felt it was necessary to go for a little more detail and carve out the head of a penis for that extra touch!

"Do You Want Me To Be Kind?"

2010-05-02T10:17:00.000-07:00

We filmed a few scenes on Saturday, a lot of which made use of some "movie magic" in terms of seriously padding the delivery man's shorts. However, one of Ryan's favorite scenes is this one, where The Warden tries to exert some of her power.

This is only a quick, rough cut so you can get a general idea. The final cut will look better.

Also, Ryan had his friend Hammy shoot a few scenes on a green screen while he was here, so here's Hammy doing what he does best, being crazy. Hammy's character is called Cyclone, and he'll be the fourth member of Seal Team 69.

Dirty Cops

2010-04-11T22:34:00.000-07:00

We had a lot of fun filming the scene where The Girl gets arrested and Ryan's opening monologue. Here's a few pictures from the shoot at Mark's Guitar Shop on Saturday.

Bob & Bill getting into their costumes.

Enjoying their uniforms.

Bob gets into character after donning the shades.

Bill tries to look tough by gazing off into the distance.

Ryan hasn't had a chance to edit any of the video from the shoot yet, so all he has to show is a few seconds of raw video.

Would You Expect Anything Less?

2010-04-10T10:10:00.001-07:00

Ryan made this prop for today's shoot at Mark's Guitars. This is what he'll be 'reading' as he starts to introduce "Dick in the Dirt" to the audience.

The Prison Band Music Video!

2010-03-16T11:25:00.000-07:00

One of the scenes in the movie takes place in the prison yard, and one of the things that Ryan really wanted in the movie was a prison band. Why? Because we saw the movie Penitentiary (It was released in 1979 and I highly recommend watching it!) and that is one of the many things in that movie that made it extra awesome.

So anyway, Ryan made sure to film three of the prisoners getting all funky, and this video is the result. Please note that this is in NO WAY the final cut. He just put this together real quick and dirty for fun. The song in the background is called "Hamburger Pimp" and is an homage to the character Hamburger Pimp in the movie Dolemite (Another MUST SEE movie, made in 1975).

And so, without further ado, here's the Dick in the Dirt prison band:

Yes, there are a lot of ass shots. That's because Ryan got all caught up in filming his favorite female body part!

Oh, and here's another still from the movie. This is where I do double duty and also play a pregnant chola prisoner.

Stills From Sunday's Shoot

2010-03-15T10:58:00.000-07:00

Sunday's movie shoot went very well. Ryan had a great time directing, and I hope all the actors and actresses had fun, despite the freezing temperatures. Here's a few stills from yesterday, and hopefully Ryan will have a little video to share soon!

Weasel telling The Girl what's what when it comes to prison life.

The new prisoners being unloaded at Rospo County Women's Corrcctions

The Girl checking out the prison yard.

The Rospo County Women's Corrections sign. Yes, it's supposed to look like that. It's a cheap-ass fly under the radar prison!

Canine and Rags discussing what to do with the new fresh meat (The Girl).

I also took quite a few pictures at the shoot, so if anyone's interested they can check out the photo set at Flickr.

New! Rough Demos of Character Themes

2010-03-03T22:40:00.000-08:00

Ryan and Doug have been very busy! Tonight they 'sketched' out some rough ideas on more music for various scenes and characters in the movie. Keep in mind that when they finally record the final product, there'll be more instruments, different arrangements in some case, and higher quality. These are just first drafts of songs that the other musicians will test out and add to them their own contributions.

First up we have the Bad-Ass Girl Theme. This will play when we see The Girl for the first time in the prison yard.

Next we have Canine's Theme. When we first see Canine, the prison bully walking through the yard to rough up her bitch, we'll be treated to a nice slo-mo of her walking tough and this music.

This is The Warden's Theme. When The Warden walks in and tells the new prisoners what's what, this will be in the background.

Ryan's calling this one Hamburger Pimp in homage to the character in the movie "Dolomite". When we see the prison band in the rec yard, this is the music that they're supposed to be playing.

When The Girl gets shown to her cell, In the Joint will play.

When Lars Thundergänk gets it on with The Warden to gain access to his woman, we'll be treated to their Love Theme.

I'm not sure what he'll do with Negro Chica. He might use it when The Girl fights Canine in the shower scene. And just so everyone doesn't freak out, Ryan realizes that the correct Spanish would be Chica Negra.

And last but not least, we have Weasel's Death Theme.

Mystery Lady: "Brown Sugar Tasty"

2010-03-02T09:40:00.000-08:00

There's a two week hiatus between filming right now, so Ryan and Doug are busy putting together a soundtrack worthy of the genius that is "Dick in the Dirt". Ryan's pulling all his musician contacts to help him record the soundtrack, and last night he and Doug put together a quick test recording of The Girl's theme song "Mystery Lady". He's sending this out to people so they know roughly what the song will sound like so they can figure out how they want to add to it. I believe the final version will feature some fantastic smooth vocals from Amanda (the lead singer in the band that Ryan is practicing with right now AND a former Season Six Idol contestant)and some jazz flute to up the cheese factor considerably.

Anyway, here's the link to "Mystery Lady". Notice the song contains such gems as "Infinity is in your stare" and "The other side of the wind is never far away" written by Ryan himself. I just want to add that as he was grooving to his own song last night, he was proudly saying things like "This is the worst, which makes it the best!" and "It takes talent to write shit like this!"

Compare the Creepiness & Choose a Favorite

2010-02-22T20:20:00.000-08:00

Ryan redid the little snippet from earlier, and he slowed it down a little and changed the music. He likes the second version better, but he'd also like to know what everyone else thinks.

Here's the original video:

Now compare it to the new video:

Which one is creepier?

A Little Taste From Yesterday's Shoot

2010-02-22T16:18:00.000-08:00

All the filming Ryan did yesterday of the very first scene in the movie is going to take a bit to be cut and edited together properly. However, there is a little preview available, and it looks pretty great! In this clip, The Hunter is sneaking up on The Girl--to see what happens next, you'll just have to wait for the movie!

Photos From Our First Video Shoot

2010-02-21T22:42:00.000-08:00

Ryan planned his first video shoot for today, which meant that Ken and Nyssa arrived at our place at 8am to prepare and go over a few things before we headed out to Mt. Spokane. Nyssa plays The Girl, and Ken plays The Hunter in the very first scene that also sets up the title of the movie.

There was only one minor setback to our plans, which was that the area where Ryan wanted to do the shoot, the road was closed for the winter. So we had to figure out something else on the fly, and we ended up finding a decent substitute area. Of course, since we were filming with Ryan's unloaded shotgun and we were near the road, Ken and I had to play lookout to make sure no passing cars saw Nyssa with the gun and got the wrong idea.

Here Nyssa pretends to set up her tent while Ryan aka "Mr. Spielberg" films and instructs her on what to do. The first time Nyssa called Ryan "Mr. Spielberg" we all laughed so hard because it was totally fitting to how he was directing everyone.

Ryan felt this log would be perfect sitting next to the firepit, but it was stuck under a small fallen tree whose roots were still attached to the soil. Nyssa and I stood around and laughed as Ken and Ryan wrestled with the log. I'm proud to report that eventually Ryan and Ken won and we were able to continue filming.

A nice shot of The Hunter sneaking up on The Girl.

My favorite picture of The Hunter sneaking up on The Girl.

Nice shot of The Hunter choking The Girl.

The Hunter getting ready to put his dick in the dirt while Ryan films it.

The Hunter playing dead.

A closer look at The Hunter's wound from The Girl's shotgun blast to the back.

Once Ryan edits and puts the video through his video editing software program and makes it look like it was shot in the 70s, it should look pretty awesome! Nyssa had a great idea, which was for one of the extras that will be on the DVD, we should get video of all the actors saying the line "Sheeeeeit!" and put it all together. I think it should be called something like the "Sheeeeit Montage".

Short Video Clip With Costume

2010-02-21T08:28:00.000-08:00

My second trip out to Value Village was a total success in terms of the costume for Lars Thundergank. Hideous pants, 70s tie, cheesy cop sunglasses, it's all there. Ryan was so happy about it that he made me film his little happy dance, and then used it to perfect his video editing skills. This looks pretty close to how the movie should look - vintage and kind of grainy.

The Ham Strikes Again--Testing Camera Angles, Embarrassing Me & Script Lines

2010-02-19T10:06:00.000-08:00

Last night Ryan wanted to test out the lighting and camera angles in our kitchen, since the very first scene will be filmed there. He wanted me to stand there and read some lines of the script with him and shoot from several different angles, so I obliged. This is the result. I do have to add that when he shot my close-ups he forgot to press record, which is why only he has the close ups. I think it was probably because he subconsciously knows how hammy he is and didn't want me stealing the scene! Also, I'd just like to say that what happens at the end will NOT be part of the movie!

Sucking Balls and Pants

2010-02-17T10:18:00.000-08:00

Ryan's still playing around with the software, trying to make sure he can make the film look like it was filmed in the late 70s. Naturally he had to include talk about his balls.

I just had to show the pants that Lars Thundergänk will be wearing in the movie, too. Check out how awesomely hideous they are! I just need to find a white belt and some white size 13 shoes to go with them.

Expense Log

2010-02-16T10:27:00.000-08:00

Went to Wal-Mart to get a few cheap shirts we can tear up for the first scene and a pair of leggings for Nyssa. Cost= $26.08

More Expenses

2010-02-15T21:27:00.000-08:00

Today Ryan had to buy a new computer that would just be used for rendering the videos shot for the film. It cost $432.63

I also went to Value Village during their half off President's Day sale with Nyssa, to buy clothes for her (she's playing The Girl) and clothes for Ryan and I. That only cost $40.50. I'll be buying more clothes at Wal-Mart tomorrow.

Making It Look Like Film, Another Test.

2010-02-14T10:43:00.000-08:00

Ryan is still doing tests with the software to see if he can make it look like old film, not HD video. Note that he's decided to make his name even bigger than the film title in the credits. That's no accident! Such is the life of a total ham.

Just a Little Taste of One of the Songs That Will Be In the Movie

2010-02-13T11:50:00.000-08:00

Ryan's fooling around with various video editing software programs, and filmed Doug playing the song that will be playing when The Girl drives into the mountains to go camping.

First Entry is Just a Boring Budget Entry

2010-02-12T21:52:00.000-08:00

Today Ryan purchased some big halogen flood lights to help with the lighting of scenes. He spent $76.07